Ukunciphisa okuncane kuyisici sezinzwa zomzwelo nezingokwengqondo zomuntu, ezivezwe ngombono omazayo wokuziphakamisa kanye nokuphakama kwabanye. Umuntu onenkinga yokungathandwa kwemvelo uzizwa engelutho, engadingekile, into efana nomkhiqizo okhubazekile. Le nkinga ayimvumeli ukuba aphile ngokuthula, ebangela izinzwa eziningi nokucindezeleka. Ngokwengqondo, ukucubungula kwezinto eziphansi kuyabhekwa kuthathwa njengokucabangela izimo ezijwayelekile zokuphila kwabantu. Kungaba yinto yonke kubantu futhi akuyona isifo sengqondo. Kwezinye izimo, kuyasiza, ukucubungula kabusha ukubaluleka kwalo kanye nokuthuthukiswa okujwayelekile komuntu ngamunye. Ngakho ulahla kanjani ubunzima obuphansi futhi kufanele ulahleke?
Umqondo wokungahle ube khona ungavela ngenxa yezizathu ezihlukahlukene:
- ukukhathazeka kwengqondo;
- ukuhluleka kokuphila;
- ukucwaswa, njll.
Owokuqala ukuthuthukisa inkolelo yenkimbinkimbi ye-inferiority kwakungu-Adler, owaphawula ukuthi lo mzwa wazalwa esemncane. Wabonisa indlela okungenakuzivikela futhi okungenakuzisiza ukuba umuntu azalwe. Kuyo yonke impilo yakhe uzama ukuzifaka emphakathini, kuqala enkulisa, esikoleni nasemsebenzini. Wonke umuntu unokwehluleka, kodwa ngamunye uyabathinta ngezindlela ezahlukene. Omunye uvuka futhi, ezamazama uthuli, uyaqhubeka, futhi othile wehla futhi azibophezele ngokungabaluleki kwakhe.
Ukungathandwa kwabathintekayo
Abantu abaningi abaqapheli ukuthi bahlushwa isifo sohlelo lwabo lokungahlaziywa. Bakuthola kunzima ukuxhumana nabanye futhi bahlale bebhekene nezinselelo. Izimpawu ezilandelayo zizokusiza uqonde ukuzethemba kwakho.
- Ukuzihlukanisa komphakathi. Abantu abanokuzihlonipha okuphansi bavame ukuhlala ndawonye. Ngokuvamile lokhu akusikho ukugxila kwangaphandle, kepha kungaphakathi. Abanye abenzi lo muntu ukuba abe yisiqhwaga, kunalokho yena ngokwakhe uzibheka engakufanelekeli emphakathini wabo. Uyesaba ukwenza noma ukusho into engafanele enkampanini yabo, yingakho evala.
- Ukukhwabanisa. Lesi sici sokuziphatha ngumzamo wokuzifaka eqenjini. Ukungakwazi ukuxhumana nabantu, umuzwa wokulahla ingxenye yabo udala ukuhlukunyezwa. Indlela enjalo yokuqala yokuzivikela.
- Ukufaka umthwalo wemfanelo enhloko ephilile. Uma kwenzeka ukuhluleka, ukuhlushwa okuncane kakhulu, kuyaqaphela ukuthi wenza iphutha, kodwa uzama ukugxeka izici zangaphandle. Ulungile ngaphambi komuntu wonke, ukusola isiphetho nenhlanhla, imvelo kanye nenkampani embi. Akakwazi nje ukuthwala umthwalo wemfanelo ngokuhluleka kwakhe namaphutha.
- Gwema ukuncintisana. Umuntu onesizotha esincane uyesaba ukuziqhathanisa nomuntu. Uyazi ngokuqinisekile ukuthi uzolahlekelwa uma eqhathaniswa. Akahlanganyeli emincintiswaneni futhi akenzi neminye imizamo yokufeza impumelelo.
- Sesha ukungaphumeleli. Umuntu onenkinga encane engabaniki ukuphumula kwabanye impumelelo yabantu. Ufuna ukungaphumeleli kubantu abaphumelelayo, ukunciphisa ukuzethemba kwabo. Uzama ukuqinisa wonke umuntu emgodini wakhe.
- Hypersensitivity. Indoda isabela ngokuhlukumeza ekugxeka nasekudumiseni. Ukuzwa ukuncoma, bayokwenqaba ukubekezela kwakhe, befuna ukuzwa ubufakazi. Ngokuvamile kuvame ukubonakaliswa okunjalo kwesakhiwo esibucayi besifazane. Bavele bacele ukuncoma. Ukugxeka kufaka phakathi izikhali ezingenakwenzeka futhi uzame ukuzithethelela.
- Ukwesaba ukwenza iphutha. Umthetho wegolide womuntu odidekile uthi: "Ongenzi lutho akenzi amaphutha." Besaba ukuthatha noma yimuphi umsebenzi ngenxa yokwesaba ukungahambi nayo.
Indlela yokubhekana nokunciphisa okuncane?
Ukuzwa ukungabi nalutho kungabonakala kunoma yimuphi umuntu esikhathini esithile sokuphila. Lokhu kuyinto evamile futhi abantu bayaphumelela kule nkathi futhi bavuselela. Kubalulekile ukuqeda, uma lo mzwa uthola umlingiswa ongapheli. Ukwelashwa okhethekile nokuqeqeshwa kungasiza umuntu ukuba athole amandla, azithanda yena futhi anqobe bonke ubunzima. Inkinga ye-inferiority complex izoxazululwa ngesikhathi umuntu ethanda yena ngokwakhe.