Kunezizathu eziningi zokuthi kungani abantu abadala abangashadile bangase baqale ukukhulumisana kakhulu kunokuba kunikezwe othintana nabo. I-psychology yobudlelwane phakathi komuntu oshadile nomfazi oshadile ngokuyinhloko isekelwe ekulindeni kwabo komunye nomunye nasemphakathini, uma lokhu kuyaziwa. Kubuye kuxhomeke kakhulu ezimweni lapho ukuxhumana kuthola khona umjikelezo omusha.
Izimbangela zemvelaphi yobuhlobo
Akuyona njalo ukukhanga phakathi kwendoda eshadile nomfazi oshadile ngokuphathelene nobuhlobo ngokushesha kukhula ebuhlotsheni obuseduze, ngezinye izikhathi iminyaka ingadlulela, lapho abalingani bakho banelisekile ngokuxhumana nokubambisana komunye nomunye, ngaphandle kokwedlula umzila wokukhwabanisa kwangempela. Ngokuvamile kwenzeka uma bengatholi injabulo emshadweni noma ekuqaleni kwaphetha ngokubala. Akuyona uthando olungavamile futhi olungapheli, okuyinto, kuye ngokuthi imvelo nobumnene bozakwethu, kuthatha okungaphezu konyaka owodwa. Esinye icala - emva kokuba abalingani bomshado bathole ukuthi abahlangani ndawonye, futhi omunye wabo "nje uyalala" ekugcineni, ngenkathi enenkani engazimisele ukunikeza isehlukaniso.
Esikebheni esiseduze, ubuhlobo phakathi kwendoda eshadile nomfazi oshadile kungadlula isikhathi, noma uqale kuye futhi ungaqhubeki emizweni ejulile. Lokhu kwenzeka: kusukela ekunganeliseki emshadweni (isimo sokuziphatha, ngokomoya kanye / noma ngokomzimba), kusukela ekuziphatheni okwenziwe ngukuzizwa kanye nokulangazelela intsha. Ngokuvamile kukhona uthando lwesikhashana esifushane.
Ukuziphatha kozakwethu
Ngokuya ngesimo sengqondo salowo wesifazane oshadile, ngisho nomfazi oshadile kakhulu, ukutholakala koxhumano ngokwawo noma uhlangothi lwayo obusondelene nalo kungaba: ukufihla ngokucophelela (ingozi yokushaya, ukushada komlingani onomhawu, izingane, isahlukaniso esingathandeki) noma nje ukumemezela.
Njengoba ngokuvamile abantu abathandanayo bethandana ngoba kubonakala sengathi banokwethenjelwa kanye nokungabikho kwezingozi ezithile ezihlobene nabalingani abangashadile, akufanele kube nesibindi (uma kungekho sizathu). Kubalulekile ukuhlala phansi bese ucabangela ukuthi kungani ngempela bajoyina lolu xhumano nokuthi yini abayifunayo kuyo. Ngokusekelwe kulokhu, hlela ukuziphatha kwakho futhi wakhe ubuhlobo obuseduze.