Umhawu ungokwengqondo

Ngezinye izikhathi, ngemva kweminyaka eminingi yokuphila komndeni, ngifuna ukuletha ubuciko ebuhlotsheni. Yilapho umqondo ovela khona ngokuqaliswa komhawu kumlingani wakho. Kulesi simo, kungenzeka ngempela ukusiza nokuvuselela ubuhlobo phakathi kwabashade. Kodwa okunye okunye, lapho umhawu unomphela, ungaphazamisa ngisho nemizwa yothando. Kusukela ekubukeni kwengqondo, umhawu ungukuthi ukuthembela kumlingani, ukwesaba nokungavikeleki. Kodwa ngenxa yemizwa enjalo akusiyo njalo isenzakalo, amacala okungaqondakali okwehlukumezeka akuzona okungajwayelekile, kulokhu ukucwaninga kwengqondo kubheka umhawu ngokwemigomo yokuguquguquka kwesimo emahlombe omlingani, ukuhlongoza izinkimbinkimbi zayo nokwesaba kuwo. Abanye ochwepheshe bathambekele ekukholelweni ukuthi imizwelo eyenziwa indoda enomhawu ibonisa ukuphazamiseka kwangaphakathi nezinkimbinkimbi, futhi isithombe somphikisana noma umphikisana naso sihle kakhulu "Mina", okungeke kwenzeke ukuba sisondele.

Umhawu wesilisa nowesifazane

Akuyona imfihlo ukuthi amadoda nabesifazane bazizwa ngendlela ehlukile. Ngakho-ke, ekuziphatheni kwengqondo, umhawu wesilisa nowesifazane unemisuka ehlukene nokubonakaliswa.

Amadoda avame ukuzama ukuba namandla amakhulu kunomfazi, anciphise ububanzi bokukhulumisana kwakhe nenkululeko yakhe yokususa abaphikisana nabo. Khona-ke ukudala lo mzwa kunanoma yini - ukwakheka okugqamile, izingubo ezinesibindi, umhlangano nabangani ngaphandle kobukhona bakhe. Lawo madoda aqinisekile ngokwabo futhi akwazi ukwethemba umlingani wabo uyobe nomhawu kuphela uma ebona ukuqoqa okuphephile kwesigamu sesibili namanye amadoda. Phakathi kwabantu abahlakaniphile ongahlangana nabo nabangenandaba nabantu abazoba nomona kuphela lapho befunda mayelana neqiniso lokuhlubuka.

Abesifazane banomona ngezinye izizathu, kaningi lo mzwa uvela ngenxa yomona. Uma ucabangela ukuthi okhethiweyo wakhe akamnakekeli kancane, owesifazane ulahlekelwa umuzwa wokuphepha futhi uzama ukuwubuyisela nganoma iyiphi indlela. Ngakho-ke, umona wesifazane uvame ukuzama ukuheha umuntu wakhe. Yiqiniso, akufanele ukwehlise umhawu owavela ngenxa yokuhlubuka.

Psychology - kanjani ukuqeda umhawu?

Endabeni yomhawu wabhala izincwadi eziningi, kokubili ubuciko, njenge "Othello", nesayensi, njenge "Psychology of jealousy" (Friedman). Izinganekwane zisitshengisa ukuthi kuyingozi kangakanani lo mzwelo, kanti nezincwadi zengqondo zithi ukususa umhawu kanjani. Into eyinhloko okufanele uyenze ukuqonda imbangela yomzwelo, futhi ngesisekelo salolu datha ukuthatha izinyathelo ezidingekayo. Ngokuvamile ngokuzimela ukubhekana nenkinga ayifuni, ke usizo lochwepheshe luyadingeka, njengoba ekwazi ukubona wonke ama-nuances futhi avule izizathu zamanje zomhawu. Kukhona futhi amathuba okubukeka kwesithunzi somzimba, okuyinto ngokuvamile engenayo isizathu sangempela. Kulesi simo, usizo lochwepheshe luvele ludingekile.