Ukuma ngokobulili komuntu kuyinkinga ebucayi, futhi abaningi abakwazi ukukhuluma ngokukhululekile ngalesi sihloko. Abantu abakhangwe namalungu obulili babo bahlale bekhona, kodwa ezweni lanamuhla, baqhubeka bekhuluma ngokukhululekile mayelana nezintandokazi zabo.
Isifundo esiyi-bi - kusho ukuthini?
Kukhona abantu abakhangwa ngokobulili kubameleli bobulili obuhlukile, futhi esimweni esinjalo kuyisiko ukukhuluma ngokuma kwabo ngokobulili. "Bi" ihunyushwa ngokuthi "ababili", okungukuthi, umuntu uzizwa uzwela kubo bobulili bobabili. Lezi ziqondiso zivame ukubizwa ngokuthi uhlobo lokungqubuzana phakathi kobulili obufanayo kanye nokuhlukunyezwa kobulili obufanayo. Umqondo wokuthi "ubungqingili" waqala ukusetshenziswa ngesikhathi sokuguqulwa kusukela ngekhulu le-19 kuya kwele-20. Izazi zengqondo zithi ukuma kwe-bi, lokhu kungaphezulu kwesilingo socansi, esivela ebucayi obusondelene nabo.
Ubani abalingani bomshado?
Abantu abanomkhuba wokulingana ngokobulili, baphile impilo evamile futhi bawavelele ngaphandle, kunzima bona baziveze ngokwabo. Kukhona ukungafani okuhlukile ngabo, isibonelo, kunombono wokuthi uBi ugqoke amacici endlebeni efanele, kodwa lokhu kuyindabakwane kuphela. Ukuqonda ukuthi kusho ukuthini, ososayensi bebelokhu beqhuba ucwaningo amashumi eminyaka ambalwa. Kwakunqunywa ukuthi abantu abesilisa nabesifazane abangeke babonakale uma umuntu ecabangela kuphela ukusabela kwawo eziteshini ezibucayi.
Inani elikhulu labangqondo nezengqondo liqinisekisa ukuthi ukuthambekela okunjalo ekuqondiseni kuhlotshaniswa nokuhlukunyezwa kwengqondo. Lokhu kuthinta ukuthi umuntu akwazi nje ukwakha ubudlelwane obugcwele nabameleli bobulili obuhlukile. Ngaphezu kwalokho, abantu abanjalo bahlale bezifuna, bengazi ukuthi indawo yabo yangempela iyini.
Ubungqingili obubanjelwe e-Congenital - Freud
USigmund Freud ungumqondo wezengqondo ogunyazayo oye wafunda amazinga ahlukene. Ekulingweni komphakathi, wanikeza lo msebenzi, obizwa ngokuthi "Izintathu Zemihlahlandlela Yezocansi." Kulo, wahlaziya umqondo wokuthi "ubungqingili." Ukuze uqonde ukuthi ubani obani, wasebenzisa ulwazi olutholakala lapho efunda embungu. Ngesikhathi ukuthuthukiswa kombungu kudlula isiteji se-hermaphroditism, okungukuthi, kunesifiso sezitho zomzimba zesilisa nowesifazane.
UFreud uphikisana ngokuthi kukhona ukuziphatha okubi kobulili, futhi umuntu ngokwakhe ekugcineni ukhetha ukuthi iyiphi indlela yokuhamba. Ukuthuthukisa, ingane iyazijwayeza izimiso zokuziphatha nezithakazelo ezithandana naye ngokobulili. Ngokuvamile kunezimo lapho lezi zimiso zingenakutholwa ngokugcwele, okubangela ukuthi amantombazane abe nomlingisi oqinile futhi okhuthazayo, futhi abafana bavele ngendlela efihlekile. Izimfanelo ezinjalo ziyizimpawu zobungqingili kwengqondo.
Izimpawu zobungqingili
Uma umuntu engabaza ukuma kwakhe, into yokuqala okufanele ayenze ukuziphendulela ngokuqondile ngombuzo wokuthi kukhona ukukhangwa ngokobulili kubantu bobulili obufanayo ngendlela efanayo nabameleli bobulili obuhlukile. Ngokwehlukana kuyadingeka ukuthi uthi ngomqondo onjalo njengobuntu bobulili obuvundile, lapho umuntu ehlala enesifiso sokwakha ubuhlobo namalungu obulili bakhe, kodwa ngenxa yezizathu eziningana, isibonelo, ukuziphatha nokuziphatha kwengqondo, ukuyiveza, akakwazi ukuvula.
Kunezivivinyo eziningana ezisiza ukuqonda ukuthi yibaphi. Benza kube lula ukunquma imodeli yokuziphatha, ukuhlaziya ukuziphatha kobulili, izifiso nezintandokazi, okunikeza ithuba lokuphawula konke "futhi". Ekuhlolweni, ucelwa ukuba uphendule imibuzo embalwa, isibonelo, "Ingabe kukhona imizwa enomusa kumngane / umngane?", "Ingabe ukuziphendukela kwemvelo kubangela ubulili bakho?", "Ungathanda yini ukuya ocansini nabantu abathathu?" Njalo njalo.
Izimpawu zobungqingili besilisa
Ososayensi abaningi abanesithakazelo kule nsimu bafika esiphethweni sokuthi ayikho ubulili besilisa. Kukholelwa ukuthi amalungu omzimba ocansini onamandla angabesilisa ocansini noma abesilisa nabesifazane, futhi uma bezibiza ngokuthi abantu abesilisa nabesifazane, bavele bafihle izintandokazi zabo zangempela zobulili. Iziphetho ezinjalo zenziwa ngokuqhuba ucwaningo, ngesikhathi abantu bebukela izithombe zobulili ezingcolile, futhi ososayensi bezwa izinzwa basabela ekuvusweni kwabo ngokocansi .
Ubungqingili emadodeni noma ukuthambekela kobudlelwane obungqingili, kubangelwa izinkinga ezingokwengqondo, isifiso sokushintsha izinsizakalo zobulili nezenhlalakahle, kanye nokuzimela kanye nokubusa. Esinye isizathu singabhekiswa emfashini wezilingo zobulili kanye nesifiso sokulawulwa kokungahambisani nomphikisi. Kwezinye izimo, indoda idinga isidingo sokusondelana ngokomzwelo nabantu bobulili obufanayo.
Ubungqingili kwabesifazane
Isifiso sabamele abesilisa ababuthakathaka ukukhombisa ukuzwelana kwabanye besifazane kubhekwa njengendlela evamile yokuphila. Ezimweni eziningi, abesifazane bafunda ukuthambekela kwabo ngokobulili ngengozi, futhi ekuqaleni kungesabisa. Izizathu ezibonakalayo zokushintsha i-orientation kungenzeka, bese ukhuluma ngezici zofuzo. Ngokuvamile, ubungqingili besifazane bubangelwa ukuhluleka okuhlobene namadoda, ukuhlukunyezwa kwengqondo kanye nokuhlangenwe nakho okuqinile ngokomzwelo. Kunezikhathi lapho abesifazane bebuyela khona ngokobulili phakathi kwesikhathi.
Ngokusho kocwaningo, inani labesifazane abesilisa nabesifazane abesilisa nabesifazane abashadile landa kakhulu. Imizamo yokuthola izimbangela ze-hormonal and congenital yezinguquko ekuthandweni kocansi ayiphumelelanga. Ukuthola ukuthi ngubani ongu-bi, kufanele kuthiwa ukukhangwa ngokobulili kuvela ebusheni, futhi ukuma kwenzelwe eminyakeni engaba ngu-11-13. Kubonakala ukuthi abesifazane kulula ukuqonda, banomusa futhi banakekele umlingani wabo, okubanika ithuba lokuzijabulisa.
Izimbangela zobungqingili
Ososayensi abakwazi ukuza nombono owodwa ngezimbangela ezingenza umehluko ekuthandweni kocansi komuntu. Nika izindawo ezizungezile nezitholakalayo ezithinta ukuma. Ngenxa yezizathu zokugcina, omunye angafaka ukunganeliseki ngocansi namalungu obulili obuhlukile. Ezimweni eziningi, lokhu kusebenza kwabesifazane. Ubungqingili babantu bangacasulwa ngezizathu eziningana:
- Ukungafuni ukuhlala ocansini oluthile nokugcina imithetho ebekiwe ngenxa yokuzimisela ngokocansi.
- Ukuba khona kwezici zobulili zomzimba zobulili zombili.
- Izinkinga ekwakheni ubuhlobo nabammeli obuhlukile.
- Isifiso sokuhlola esitelekeni sezocansi.
- Ukuhlukunyezwa kwengqondo ebuntwaneni nasekukhuleni.
Ingabe ubulili buyinto evamile noma cha?
Abachwepheshe bacabanga ukuthi umkhuba wendabuko kuphela, okuwukuthi, isifiso somuntu wesifazane, futhi ngokufanayo. Ukuziphatha ngokobulili kubhekwa njengokuphambuka kwengqondo. Noma kunjalo, ososayensi bakholelwa ukuthi umuntu akakwazi ukuthanda bonke abesilisa nabesifazane, ngoba kamuva uzokhetha ukulingana kobulili obufanayo noma ocansini. Kukhona ososayensi abathi abalingani bobulili bayizivamile futhi abantu abangaba ngu-70% banesimo esinjalo.
Ungabhubhisa kanjani ubulili?
Ukuze umuntu azizwe ekhululekile, kufanele ukuthi uthathe isenzo sakhe socansi. Ukuphoqeleka ukuziphoqa uqobo ukuyeka ukuthanda amadoda noma besifazane akunakwenzeka. I-psychology yobungqingili ibonisa ukuthi uma izinguquko ekuqondeni zibangelwa ukuhlukunyezwa kwengqondo, khona-ke kudingekile ukufuna usizo ochwepheshe ozosiza ukuqonda wena kanye nezintandokazi zakho zobulili.