Ukuthonya umuntu akukhona nje kuphela ngokomzimba, kodwa nangokwengqondo. Shayela kokungazi kwakhe, imizwelo, ukuphatha futhi uhlanganyele ekusikiseni. Eqinisweni, lokhu ukuhlaselwa kwengqondo kumuntu.
Kusukela kuphi futhi ngani?
Ubani okuzuzisa ukuthonya abantu ngale ndlela? Njengomthetho, ongaziwa kahle, abantu abangafundile abaqhuba imigomo ethile. Esikhundleni samaqiniso, "bacindezela" ngemizwa. Ukuthola isipho 'sokudlala' emizimbeni, kubangela ukwesaba, intukuthelo, isihawu, ngaleyo ndlela kubangele umuntu enze izenzo ezithile ezizuzisa kubo. Laba bantu bangabasebenzi abanamakhono. Wonke umuntu angangena kwinethiwekhi yabo. Endaweni engcupheni yilezi:
- abantu abanomzwelo ngokweqile;
- labo ababhekene nokucindezeleka okukhulu (ukulahlekelwa othandekayo, isifo esibi kakhulu);
- abantu abayiziwula nabangenalutho;
- abantu abanelungelo lokuhlupheka, isibonelo, ukuphazamiseka kwengqondo;
- izingane kanye nentsha.
Kuyasabeka kakhulu lapho omunye wabashade emndenini ehlala kule ndlela yokuthonya amalungu omndeni. Ebudlelwaneni nengxenye yakhe yesibili, le manipulator ingashintsha amehlo akhe ku-tyrant and despot, ehlala ephazamisa izinzwa. Isimo esibusa emndenini onjalo sishiya okuningi.
Ukuba nomthelela ongokwengqondo ezinganeni zabo, abazali kufanele bakhumbule ukuthi konke kulungile ngokulinganisela. Ungadluli "induku" futhi kunoma yikuphi okungafanele udlale ukwesaba kwezingane. Izindlela ezinjalo zemfundo esikhathini esizayo ziyoba nomthelela omubi kwengqondo yengane.
Ukuzivikela
Kubalulekile ukwazi ukuthi ukuvikela kuphi. Noma yimuphi umthelela kumuntu, okuholela ekungenilekeni kwengqondo, ukuphazamisa futhi kukhona ukuhlaselwa kwengqondo. Enye yezindlela ezivame kakhulu zethonya elinjalo ukuhlaselwa kwengqondo komuntu ngamunye. Iqukethe ukucindezelwa kolwazi kumuntu, ihlose ukumphuca ithuba lokucabanga ngokulinganayo. Inkulumo esheshayo kakhulu, izakhiwo zokukhuluma eziyinkimbinkimbi, imigomo, i-interlocutor yenza konke umuntu angenawo isikhathi sokungena kulokho okushiwo yile ndaba. Ungase uhlangabezane nokuziphatha okunjalo, isibonelo, emakethe. Lapho, abathengisi abacasulayo bezinye izincwadi noma ama-shawls bazokwenza
Manje kumbuzo wokuthi ungazivikela kanjani ekuhlaselweni kwengqondo. Uma uzizwa ungakhululekile lapho usebenzelana nomuntu, uzizwe ucindezelekile, ukwethuka nokukhathazeka - ngokushesha futhi ngaphansi kwanoma yisiphi isizathu sokushiya inkampani yakhe. Uma ungeke ukwazi ukuphendula ngokucindezela okufanele, yenza ngezindlela zalo, kungcono ukugwema ukuxhumana nomuntu onjalo.
Thembela engqondweni yakho, ungabonisi imizwelo ngokweqile futhi uhlale uqiniseka ngokwakho.