Uma unemoya wokudlala, futhi ufuna ukunikeza othandekayo wakho isicaciso esiqondile, cabanga ngalokho okumele ubhale umfana ukuba amvuse. Kungase kube nezinketho eziningi, kodwa kubalulekile ukukhetha okuzozwakala kumvelo kusuka kuwe - ngaphandle kwalokho umuntu angathatha udlala ngothando noma ihlaya, bese usabela ngendlela ehlukile kunalokho okulindele.
Indlela yokujabulisa umfana ngokubhala?
Njengoba kuyaziwa, amadoda asabela kahle emifanekisweni ebonakalayo (yingakho i-orotica kanye nezithombe zobulili ezingcolile zithandwa kakhulu). Uma ungafuni ukuchitha isikhathi ekuhambisaneni, ukusungula othintana naye nokunye okunjalo, khona-ke ungakwazi ukubhala ukuthi yini owathenge izingubo zangaphansi ezintsha, i-corset noma inhlanganisela, futhi uthumele ukudubula okudukisayo into entsha. Ngendlela, ngisho noma ungathumeli isithombe, kodwa uchaza ngokuningiliziwe ukuthi ubukeka kanjani, ukubhekelela ngokukhethekile esifubeni, ezinqeni nasezinkalweni, umphumela ungaba namandla kakhulu.
Amadoda futhi ayaphendula kahle ngentshiseko yowesifazane. Uma ucabanga ukuthi yimaphi amazwi okujabulisa umfana, ungenzi imibhalo yobuciko, kodwa zama nje ukuveza ngokucacile lokho ofuna ukukwenza kuye, izikhathi ezingaki.
Enye indlela yokuthakazelisa indoda ukukukhumbuza iqembu elikhuthele kunazo zonke okwake kwaba khona, ukuphawula imininingwane embalwa oyithandayo ngaphezu kwabanye.
Indlela yokujabulisa umfana onthanethi?
E-intanethi, hhayi kuphela izincwadi ezikhona, kodwa futhi nokushintshaniswa kwezithombe namavidiyo, kanye nokuxhumana kwevidiyo ebukhoma. Uma ufuna, ungakhetha isikhathi esifanele lapho umfana engaphazamiseki, bese ummema ukuba akhulume, isibonelo, ku-Skype. Beka izingubo zangaphansi zangaphandle zokugqoka bese ubhekana nayo yonke inkazimulo yayo. Uma lokhu kuyamangalisa, cishe kungenzeka ukuthi umphumela oyifunayo uzoba noma ngabe ungasho lutho.
Embuzweni wokuthi ungamjabulisa kanjani umfana cishe, kubalulekile ukuqonda imigomo oyiphishekelayo. Uma ulindele ukuthi emva kwalokho uzoza kuwe ukuze kube nokuqhubeka okuhle, awukwazi ukungena amahloni ngokukhetha izindlela zokuthakazelisa nokunikela noma yini, kuze kube ngokobulili obubonakalayo. Uma nje ufuna ukumbambaza, kungcono ukuthi ungahambi kude, kodwa ukuze uthole ngezindlela zokukhanya-ngokwesibonelo, ukusho ukuthi ulahlekelwe kangakanani, njengokungathi uzibophezele ngokuzibulala emzimbeni.
Ngaphezu kwalokho, qaphela ukuqala umlingani uma ude kakhulu komunye nomunye: kungenzeka ukuthi uzokhipha isinqumo sokukhipha injabulo eyatholwa ngowesifazane wokuqala owabanjwa.