Akunakwenzeka ukugwema izimo zokuphikisana. Kunabantu abaningi, imibono eminingi. Ngokushintshanisa imicabango yethu, ulwazi, isipiliyoni, asiphoqeleli ukucabanga kuphela ngokusekelwe emibono yethu, kodwa futhi ukulalela, ngokuvamile okuphambene nombono wethu we-interlocutor. Futhi lapho izithakazelo zingavumelani, kuvela izingxabano.
Izingxabano azihlali zichitha njalo. Ngokuvamile kunesimo sokulwa lapho iqiniso lizalwa khona. Isixazululo esilungile nesiqondayo senkinga singatholakala nangemva kokuxazulula isimo sokungqubuzana. Imvelo eyakhayo noma eyonakalisayo yenkambinkimbi inqunywa indlela oyikhethayo ukuxazulula le mpikiswano.
Zithobile wena ngokwakho ...
Ukuhlala yedwa, ukungqubuzana kwangaphakathi kungase kuvele kunoma yisiphi isenzakalo. Ngokuvamile, lapho okulindelekile akuhambisani nalokho esikukho ngempela, ukungqubuzana okungahambi kahle kubangelwa ukuqonda kwethu, okungukuthi, ukungqubuzana okwenzeka ngaphakathi kwethu, ngaphakathi komphefumulo wethu, ukuqonda kwethu. Izindlela zokuxazulula izingxabano ezingasetshenzisiwe zisekelwe, okokuqala, ekuhlaziyweni kwesimo nasekukhoneni imbangela yokuphazamiseka. Indlela eqinisekile yokuthola inkinga ukubhala isitatimende salokho okukhathazayo ngakho. Njengoba ubhale wonke amaphuzu, futhi uma ubheke okwenzekile, uzobe usuvele wazi "isitha" sakho ngedwa.
Manje ake sibheke izindlela eziphumelelayo kakhulu zokubhekana nezingxabano zangaphakathi.
- Ukwamukelwa "Yini elandelayo?" Bhekisela kulokho obhale. Ukufunda isigaba ngasinye, ngokwengqondo, noma ngokuzwakalayo, zibuze umbuzo: "Futhi yini elandelayo?". Buza lo mbuzo imibuzo emisha nokuphikisana okuvela ekhanda lakho, izimpendulo ngeke zithathe isikhathi eside ukulinda. Qhubeka lo mnyaka kuze kube yilapho impendulo yakho ithi: "Akukho!". Kanye "akukho lutho", ngakho-ke kufanelekile ukukhathazeka mayelana nezicucu? Konke, umbuzo uxazululwe. Ngokuvamile siphuthumisa izinkinga zethu, senza, njengoba besho, ziphuma emanqenqemeni endlovu.
- Ukushintsha isimo sengqondo. Uma kwenzeka ukuthi awukwazi ukushintsha isimo, ungasheshi ukuzilimaza, zama ukushintsha isimo sakho sengqondo kule nkinga. Hlola isimo kusuka esimweni sokubheka izikhathi ezinhle, futhi bayothola, kholwe. Emva kokushintsha isimo sengqondo kule nkinga, uzozizwa ukhululekile, futhi maduze inkinga izoziqeda ngokuphelele.
Ukuvela kwezingxabano ezithintekayo kungasithinti isimo sengqondo esinempilo. Ukukhathazeka nokukhathazeka ngeke kudlule kuze kube yilapho imbangela iqedwe. Ngakho-ke, ukuzama ukushintshela esimweni, ukuzama ukungazicabangi ngesiguli, ukukhipha noma ukubuyisela inkinga engaxazululwa ngenye into ayifanele. Isikhathi esithile uzokhohlwa ukuthi yini ekukhathazayo. Kodwa lokhu ngeke kuhlale isikhathi eside, njengoba imbangela yokulwa izohlala ingaguquki. Ungagijimi kuwe, ungesabi, ukuzivikela okungcono kakhulu ukuhlaselwa kokwesaba kwakho.
Wena nabanye
Emsebenzini, ekhaya, emcimbini - nomaphi lapho kudingeka khona ukuxhumana nabantu kukhona izingxabano nezingxabano. Lokhu kuvamile, futhi kungokwemvelo. Kunezindlela eziningi zokuxazulula izingxabano zomphakathi, okungukuthi, izingxabano phakathi kwabantu ngabanye. Wonke umuntu uzikhethela ukukhetha kokuziphatha okuhambisana kakhulu nemigomo yakhe, imvelo, nokubaluleka kokuxazulula le nkinga.
- Indlela eyakhayo yokuxazulula izingxabano yinkinga. Kulesi simo, izinhlangano eziphikisanayo zixazulula inkinga ngezimo ezingamukelekile noma ezingavumelani wonke umuntu. Lapha, ngesilinganiso esithile, kokubili kokuwina.
- Ukugwema noma ukugwema ingxabano akuyona indlela engcono kakhulu yokuxazulula le nkinga. Lokhu kuziphatha kungaba yisibhamu sesikhathi. Ngenkathi ugwema ukuxabana okuvulekile, ukucindezeleka nokuphelelwa yithemba kuzothola kuwe. Amathuba amancane ukuthi esikhathini esizayo lokhu kuzoba yingxabano engaphakathi komuntu. Ingabe udinga lokhu? Sombulula inkinga njengoba kwenzeka.
- Izingxoxo njengendlela yokuxazululwa kwemibango zinemithetho ethile. Okokuqala,
kudingekile ukunikeza ukucaca okucacile kwesimo sawo kanye nezimbangela zayo. Okwesibili, kubalulekile ukuhlonipha umbono we-interlocutor, ukwazi ukulalela, futhi uzame ukucubungula izixazululo ezihlongozwayo ekuxabaneni. Inhloko eyodwa, njengoba ithi, inhle, kodwa kabili kungcono.
Izindlela zokuxazulula izingxabano zomndeni kufanele zisekelwe emgomweni ofanayo - ukudala nokulondoloza umshado ojabulisayo. Akukho mholi emshadweni, akekho abawinile noma abalahlekile. Uyiqembu, futhi uma othile elahlekile, ulahlekelwe kokubili. Futhi awukwazi ukuhlela ukulwa, ukuze uthole ukuthi yikuphi kokubili emndenini "okupholile". Unomgomo owodwa, lapho nonke niphakamisa imigomo yenu ehlangene, la masango yizimo zokuphila lapho manje nidinga ukusinda, ukwenza ndawonye kanye ndawonye. Ngakho-ke, ukuxazulula izingxabano, khumbula into esemqoka - ngomunye nomunye.