Ukuhlaziywa komsebenzi

Izindlela zokuhlaziywa kwemisebenzi zenziwa yi-American psychotherapist u-Eric Berne ngo-1955. Kamuva, le ndlela yasetshenziswa futhi yafezwa ngabaningi be-psychotherapists abanethalente. Izindlela zokuhlaziywa komthengi zivumela abantu ukuba baziqonde futhi baqonde ukuziphatha kwabo. Lokhu kuyadingeka kubantu abanenkinga yengqondo, banenkinga yokukhuluma. Ukuhlaziywa kwemisebenzi kusiza ukuqonda imbangela yezingxabano futhi uthole izindlela zokuziqeda.

Izinhlinzeko eziyisisekelo kanye nemibono yokuhlaziywa kwemisebenzi

Ukuhlaziywa komsebenzi ngezinye izikhathi kubizwa ngokuthi ukuhlaziywa kokuxhumana, ngoba kuhlola umuntu ngokuxhumana nabanye abantu. Izisekelo zezinqubo zokuhlaziywa komthengi yizitatimende ezilandelayo:

1. Bonke abantu bajwayelekile, umuntu ngamunye unelungelo elilinganayo lokuzihlonipha yena nombono wakhe. Umuntu ngamunye unokubaluleka nesisindo.
2. Bonke abantu banekhono lokucabangela, ngaphandle kwezimo zokulimala noma ukutholwa, noma ukungazi.
3. Abantu ngokwabo bayakha ikusasa labo futhi basesimweni sokushintsha izimpilo zabo ngaphandle kokulandela izinqumo zangaphambili.

Isiphakamiso esiyisisekelo umbono wokuthi umuntu ofanayo, ezimweni ezahlukene, angenza ngesisekelo se-ego states. Ukuhlaziywa kwemisebenzi kuhlukanisa ama-ego amathathu athi: ingane, omdala nomzali.

Okuyinhloko kokuhlaziywa kokuthengiselana

Njengoba sekushiwo ngenhla, ngokwengqondo, ngenhloso yokuhlaziywa kwemisebenzi, izigaba ezintathu ze-ego zikhethwe: ingane, umzali nomuntu omdala.

1. I - ego-state yengane ibhekene nezisusa zemvelo ezivela enganeni. Kufaka phakathi okuhlangenwe nakho kwasebuntwaneni, izimo zengqondo, ukusabela kwakho kanye nabanye abantu. Isimo esinjalo siboniswa njengokuziphatha okudala kumuntu osebusaneni. Isimo somntwana sinesibopho sokubonakaliswa kokudala komuntu.
2. Isimo se-ego somuntu omdala asincike eminyakeni yobudala bomuntu. Kuboniswa ngesifiso sokuthola ulwazi lomgomo kanye nokukwazi ukubona iqiniso langempela. Lesi simo sibonisa umuntu ohleliwe, oshintshe kahle futhi onokwenza kahle. Usebenza ngokutadisha iqiniso, ngokucophelela ukuhlola amandla akhe nokubala kuwo.
3. I-state-state yomzali ihlanganisa isimo sengqondo umuntu asithatha ngaphandle, kaningi kubazali bakhe. Ngaphandle, lesi simo sibonakaliswa isimo sengqondo sokukhathalela nokugxila kwabanye abantu nokubandlululwa okuhlukahlukene. Isimo sangaphakathi somzali sibhekene nokuziphatha komzali, okuqhubekayo kuthinta ingane encane ehlala kithi ngamunye.

Isikhathi ngasinye sihambisana nenye yalezi zizwe futhi umuntu uziphatha ngokuhambisana nalo. Kodwa i-transactivity iphi, kungani ukuhlaziywa kubizwa kanjalo?

Iqiniso liwukuthi ukuthengiselana kubizwa ngokuthi iyunithi yokukhulumisana, enezinto ezimbili: ukugqugquzela nokuphendula. Isibonelo, ukukhipha ifoni, sisho ukubingelela (ukuvuselela), okwenza umxhumanisi aqale ingxoxo (okungukuthi, silindele ukusabela kwakhe). Uma ukuxhumana (okungukuthi, ukushintshanisa ukuthengiselana), ama-ego-states of the interlocutors asebenzisana, futhi ukuthi ukuphumelelana kanjani lokhu kuzoba kuncike ekutheni singahlola ngempela isimo sethu nesimo se-interlocutor.

Kunezinhlobo ezintathu zokuthengiselana: ukufana (ukukhulumisana phakathi kontanga, ukusabela kugcwalisa ukuvuselela), intersecting (izikhombisi ze-stimulus kanye nokuphendula ziphikisana, isibonelo, impendulo ebukhali kumbuzo wansuku zonke) futhi kufihliwe (lo muntu akasho ukuthi yiziphi izenzo ubuso obuso abuhambisani namagama).

Ngaphezu kwalokho, ukuhlaziywa kokuthengiselana kuthatha imiqondo enjengesi simo kanye nesimo se-antis sokuphila komuntu. Isimo - lezi yizilungiselelo, okuyinto ngokucophelela noma ngokungazi kahle ihlelwe ebuntwaneni ngabazali bethu (othisha). Kusobala ukuthi akuzona njalo izilungiselelo ezinjalo zilungile, zivame ukwephula impilo yomuntu, ngakho-ke kudingeka zidedwe. Kule njongo, okubizwa okuthiwa ama-anti-scene (counter-scenarios) asetshenziswa. Kodwa uma uqamba isimo esinjalo sabantu, umuntu akenzi njalo ngaso sonke isikhathi, uqala ukushintsha konke, ngisho nalawo mqondo womzali okulungile futhi okudingekayo kuye. Ngakho-ke, kufanele kukhunjulwe ukuthi ngenxa yokuhlaziywa kokuthengiselana, isimo sokuphila kufanele sibuyekezwe, kodwa ngokuphumelelayo, sicabange wonke amaqembu aphikisayo namanje akhona.