Ukukhula kwengane kungenye yezinzima kakhulu ekuphileni komuntu, ngoba phakathi nalesi sikhathi lapho ukwakhiwa kobuntu kuphelele, ukulinganisa kwamagugu kanye nezinto eziza kuqala ekuphileni kuphelile. Ngaphezu kwalokho, kukhona ukuthuthukiswa kocansi okusebenzayo, okubhekene nezinguquko ebhalansi ye-hormonal. Futhi kanye nama-hormone "agijima" nomzwelo: kukhona ukucasula, ukuhlukumezeka, ukukhala. Izingane zango-jen ziyakhathazeka kakhulu, zisabela ngokujulile ezintweni ezibonakala zingenasidingo. Ngakho-ke, lapho behlangabezana nezinkinga, ngokuvamile balahlekile, ngoba abanalo ulwazi lokuxazulula izimo zokuphila eziyinkimbinkimbi. Ezinganeni ezisengozini ikakhulukazi ezibucayi, ezimweni ezinjalo, kungase kuvele imicabango yokuzibulala.
Ngokwezibalo, ukuzibulala kuvame ukuqhutshwa ngabasha abaneminyaka engama-10 kuya kwengu-14. Kuyiphutha ukucabanga ukuthi ukuzibulala phakathi kwentsha kuyisikhathi sabokufika emindenini ehluphekile. Ngokuvamile, izingane ezivela emindenini engaphandle zijwayele ukuziphatha okulimazayo. Kodwa yini ebacindezela isinyathelo esinjalo esabekayo?
Izimbangela zokuzibulala ezinganeni
- Uthando olungalindelekile. Yebo, kungenzeka eminyakeni eyishumi. Futhi ngenxa yentombazane (noma umfana) kuyoba yinkinga yangempela ukuthi into yokudumisa ayibheki ekuqondeni kwayo. Izimpikiswano ezinengqondo ukuthi "uSasha uzoba ngaphezulu kwesigidi ngaphezulu" angaqondakali, ingane ayikhathaleli ukuthi kuzokwenzekani esikhathini esizayo, uhlala lapha futhi manje. Izinsana zitholakala ku-maximalism, zidinga konke noma lutho. Uma bengakwazi ukuthola lokho abakufunayo, bakhetha "lutho" ...
- Ukungabi namandla. Uma intombazane ithola izimo ezinzima, ukulwa nakho angakwazi, ingakhetha ukuzibulala njengendlela yokuxazulula inkinga yakhe.
- Indawo yokubheka. Uma ingane ingenesizungu futhi inganaki ukunakwa, ingazama ukumheha kuye ngale ndlela. Ngokuvamile, eqondiswa yilesi sizathu, intombazane ingaba nomzamo wokuzibulala, ngoba eqinisweni, ukufa akusona uhlelo lwakhe.
- Ukuphathwa. Ngenhloso yokuxhaphaza abathandekayo, kubuye kube nemizamo yokuqamba amanga, yokubonisa ukuphuma empilweni. "Lapha ngizofa - futhi uzoqonda ukuthi akunakwenzeka kanjani", ingane icabanga. Uma imizamo enjalo ifinyelela ekufeni kwangempela, khona-ke kuphela uma kwenzeka ukunganaki.
- Ukuzwa ngokungabi nalutho. Kuye, ngokuvamile uhlangana nezintsha ezisengozini, ngenhlangano engokwenyama engokomoya. Izwe labo elingaphakathi eliyinkimbinkimbi kunzima abantu abadala ukuba baqonde, ontanga abamukeli futhi bacabange ukuthi uyadedelwa.
Kufanele usondele nini ukusondelana?
Ukuzibulala kwentsha kungaba kokubili okuhleliwe, okucatshangelwayo, kanye nokwenza okuzenzakalelayo, okwenziwe nge-affective. Ngokuvamile kulandelwa ukubonakaliswa okulandelayo:
- Ingane ivaliwe, akanabahlobo futhi akakhulumanga nabazali bayo.
- Ingane ngokuzumayo ibonakala inganaki futhi inganandaba nakho konke.
- Ingane ithambekele ku-hypochondria, icabanga ngezifo "ezimbi".
- Ingane idonsela izithombe emcabangweni bese ibuza ukuthi kuzokwenzekani lapho efa.
- Ingane iqala ngokusabalalisa ukusabalalisa abangane nabakujwayele izinto ezibizayo kuye.
Zonke lezi zimpawu ziyizimpawu eziphazamisayo. Ngokuvamile lokho kubonisa ukuthi ingane isuvele isinqume konke futhi manje ihlela futhi ikhetha isikhathi.
Ukuvimbela ukuzibulala phakathi kwentsha kuyinhloko ebalulekile kubazali. Kubalulekile ukuqapha isimo sengqondo nokuziphatha kwengane, ukuphawula izinguquko ezenzekayo. Ukuze ugweme usizi, kubalulekile kusukela ekuzalweni ukwakha ubudlelwane obethembayo emndenini. Ungavumeli izinkinga zezingane, ngisho noma zibonakala zingumfana - ingane kule akhawunti ngombono ohlukile. Fundisa ingane ukuveza imizwa yakhe, futhi ingavali, ngoba lesi sibonelo sibalulekile - bonisa ukuthi uzizwa kanjani.
Khumbula ukuthi intombazane akufanele isabe ukuxoxa nawe nezinkinga zakhe. Ubuhlobo obufudumele, ukwethembela nokwamukela okungenamthetho kungavimbela inkinga yokuzibulala phakathi kwentsha.